I intended on writing a “Post Ironman” summary right after I had written the Swim, the Bike, and the Run segments about my race. However, every time I would sit down to do it, I had a huge mental block. It has been over 6 weeks from race day and I am still trying to wrap my head around the entire experience.
Some days I feel very proud of myself for finishing, despite all my difficulties. Other days, I feel depressed that I had worked so hard and nothing turned out the way I had envisioned it. At times, I have even felt angry, especially about what happened on the bike course, “Why me?”, etc. It’s a jumble of emotions to sort through!
I ran into a colleague at my “Surprise” 5K a few weeks ago, who had done Ironman Lake Placid several years back. He had gone into the race with a healthy body and had an uneventful (good) day. He said it still took him about a year to mentally process everything about the training and race. This made me feel a little better about my mixture of feelings about the event.
I have to admit that I feel like I have this “unresolved race” inside of me. I had spent 8 months training for this grand event that never came to fruition. It’s a frustrating feeling because I did finish the event against many odds and I am officially an Ironman! I should be thrilled (and a lot of the time I am!). However, I still have a feeling of disappointment like “I’m not really an Ironman because it took so long”. Obviously, I did what I could on the swim and bike and I am proud of that. Although, every time I retell the story of my shifter breaking on the bike course, I shudder a bit at the idea that I was almost not able to finish! Should I have tried to push myself harder on the run? I don’t know.
So what’s next? If you had asked me the day before Ironman Mont Tremblant, I would have said that I was 99% sure that I would be doing it again in 2016. However, after the race, that 1% of uncertainty won out! I realized that anything can happen during a race of that magnitude. I could have started the day with a healthy body and still had mechanical problems on my bike or injured myself, etc. leaving me with the feeling of an “unresolved race”!
Will I do another Ironman? Yes, again, I say this with 99% certainty, but it will not be in 2016. However, my family absolutely loved Mont Tremblant and asked to go back there next year for vacation. So, I am going to make it a Race-cation and do the 70.3 there next June! I am really looking forward to focusing on a shorter event and hoping to have a better experience on race day! As for now, I am taking a much needed break from biking and going to focus on running. And speaking of Race-cations… I started training for the Walt Disney World Marathon last week, so that is what is on the horizon here! I’m very excited about the opportunity to do this and I am working on some new running goals!
Have a Great Week!!